Let's Try Something Different This Week

And a meditation for you to do on the go.

Hello.

I was thinking the other day that asking people to slow down is a big deal. It’s much easier said than done. We have busy, full lives and I understand that meditation can feel like one more thing to do. It might feel like there just isn’t time.

Maybe you are tired and would rather sleep in, watch TV, or read a book. Perhaps you don't know where to begin. Stating something new can feel overwhelming. (I can help with this. Just ask me.) Today, instead of suggesting meditation, I am going to suggest a way to work some meditative moments into your day.

And I’ve got good news: meditation is a shape-shifting tool that people use for different outcomes. There are many styles of meditation, so there is bound to be something for everyone. The key is to match the meditation to the person and their desired outcomes.

Some people cannot sit still. They may be better with an active or walking meditation. People who don’t like the spiritual connotations of meditation can often get comfortable with and benefit from conscious breathing. People who are emotional-feeling types tend to like loving-kindness meditation. Analytical people gravitate to breath or present-moment awareness meditation. Seekers prefer mantas and transcendental meditation.

People also want different outcomes. Some want to feel calmer. Some want to be able to focus. Some are looking to heal relationships, including with themselves. Some ask what meditation can do for pain relief. Others seek help falling asleep. The list and corresponding benefits are endless. No wonder it’s hard to decide where to begin.

One of the reasons you see a variety of meditations from me on this substack is so that you can try different ways of meditating and decipher what fits. The commonality is that we all want to feel better. And, what I truly admire is that you are here taking action to do that.

There is no one-size-fits-all solution to meditation, but there is something I can recommend for everyone. To make meditation most accessible to all, it helps to consider our modern lifestyle and work with the actual on-the-ground challenges of life. In fact, sign me up for any activity that can help humans cope better with the nitty-gritty of our day-to-day —the to-do lists, the mishaps, the frustrations, the pressure and expectations we put on ourselves. All of it. Make that feel better and I am in.

Here is a way that we can make our days more meditative.

If you have ever taken a meditation or yoga class with me, you know that the first thing we do is to check in with ourselves. And during our time together, I will continue to cue you to feel something in your body or notice what thoughts are distracting you. It is a technique to help you be more aware of how you are experiencing each moment.

When you pause to do this you can ask yourself some questions. How are you feeling physically, in your body, and in your mind? What are you holding on to? Is there some physical tension you can release? Maybe in your shoulders or jaw? Is there some idea that you keep returning to that you can let go of? Even a bit? Are you cold, hungry, tired, thirsty? What can you notice around you that’s good or healing? Can you spend some time appreciating that? Expecting you to slow down is a lot to ask. I understand that. So try it in small doses and see if it helps. Pick one question to consider. Once you know what you have going on, you understand what you are working with. Without judging it, arm yourself with information so you can more thoughtfully go about your day.

I try to check in with myself throughout the day and make decisions about how to support myself from there. That’s it. Sort of meditate all the time, informally.

And then, I use the meditations we all know, on the go. When I am feeling a big distraction or a reaction to something or someone, I try to pause and check in before I respond. Examples will help me explain.

In a busy airport terminal, people are agitated and rushing. Everyone is trying to get somewhere. It’s easy to get caught up in that—so do something else. Distract yourself in a good way. Try to look at people with neutral or kind eyes. Send well wishes. “May you be happy” to the person saying goodbye to a loved one. “May you be at peace” to the one shouting at the gate agent. “May you be at ease” to the gate agent. “May you be safe” to the child traveling alone. We humans all want to be happy, healthy, safe, loved. Offer everyone unconditional good wishes. “May all beings be at peace.” This exercise helps us be less judgemental. It’s also really fun. You can do it at the grocery store, on the street, at work—anywhere. It’s a stealthy form of kindness. You see a lot more and feel more connected to the people around you.

If that sounds too sappy, you can look at people and find something to like about them. Admire the parent who is patient with a crying toddler. A teenager who lets you go first. A checkout agent who greets everyone kindly. A co-worker offering to help. The person in line’s joyful laughter. You get the idea. This exercise will help you tune in and focus. It might help you see the good in people. If you want, you can compliment the people you encounter. If that feels like too much, stay silent.

There are so many ways to stay present, be open, and notice. We do this with our eyes closed sitting, as practice for “real” life, and there is no reason we can’t take the spirit of this practice out into the world with us when we go about our days.

I’m all-in on this modern, accommodating direction, learning as we go, to maintain inner peace, feel happier, sleep better, have more mental clarity, and take life’s wallops in stride. And it is what I am currently working on for myself and you. Anything that can make the practice more accessible, and meet real humans where we are is a place where we can all benefit.

So please try this, but also yes, have no fear, we will still have a recorded meditation this week. This week’s guided practice is one I recorded years ago and if I had to pick, it is probably my preferred way to meditate. It works for me. The open awareness style helps me be more self-aware and also more aware of what is happening around me. It builds empathy and is in keeping with the theme this week. We simply pause, check in with ourselves, and notice what is happening. We adjust where we need to, and keep going.

If you need help, please ask. Thanks for being here. It means the world to me.

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One more thing. Do you have a question about meditation for me? One that I could address in a future post? Send an email with your question. If you can include some context that would be helpful. You can remain anonymous. I will select one or maybe more to answer in upcoming posts.